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The third dimension of Jesus’ love for the Church as we see in Ephesians 5 is nourishment. In the same way, a man ought to love his wife by nourishing her.

To nourish is to feed, water, pour manure upon, invest in and insist on her greenness.

This nourishment ought to cut across the three aspect of her being.

Her body must be nourished with good and nutritious food. You must make it your project that she’s eating well.

Not necessarily expensive food that are destructive or junks, but nutritious foods; fruits and vegetables, plant and healthy animal protein and any other class of food that’ll make her healthy. The good news is that most nutritious food are not expensive. No matter your income bracket you can provide your family with nutritious diets.

If she has a bad eating habit or fond of eating junks, it’s part of your love for her to dissuade her, to keep fighting her until she begins to eat right. You should also invest in purchasing nutritional guides by experts and be the first to read them in order to supervise healthy eating in your home.

Anytime I come across books on nutrition, I buy them eagerly and I read them enthusiastically.

I also prefer natural food that are well cooked as opposed to fast food. And so despite all my wife’s craving for Shawarma, ice cream and stuffs like that, I don’t buy them for her. (I bought her a cake with some cream recently though. Just for some balance ?). Anytime I take her out, instead of taking her to fast food and junk restaurants which she prefers, I do stubbornly take her to where she’ll eat good Amala and beans soup with fish or goat meat. ?? As she’s devouring it, I do feel good that I’m really nourishing her well.

Her skin must be nourished too. That’s where skin care products come in. You have to take interest in this to fulfil your ministry of nourshing her body. Both during our Courtship and in the last one year, I’ve spent incredible sums (as the Lord provided) to purchase foreign skin care products for Madam so that that skin can be well nourished.

No matter your income bracket, there are affordable and effective skin care products that you can get to nourish your wife.

Next is her soul and the first point of call in that realm is the mind. Her mind must be nourished. You should see to it that she’s reading stimulating materials. Buy her books and follow her up to read it. It should worry you as a husband if your wife is intellectually empty. If she can’t contribute meaningfully to topical issues.

Many women don’t like to read at all. They prefer to watch movies and I wish they were watching educational movies and documentaries. That would have been good for the stimulation of their mind. Unfortunately most prefer mere entertainment movies. And those who are not watching movies love to sleep at every spare time.

As a correct husband, you must not agree to this. She can’t be spending all her spare time sleeping or watching entertainment movies. She must read. She must keep upgrading her intellect. It’s your duty to see to it that her mind is never allowed to grow weed.

To nourish her emotions which is the other department of the soul, you do that by showing her genuine affection and I’ll share in the next post one major way to do that.

Finally, her spirit must be nourished. You must expose her to the good word of God. The first step is to find a local assembly where the good word of God is preached without adulteration. While you must consider your wife’s opinion, as the Priest the bulk stops at your table.

Your choice of a local church shouldn’t be based merely on the physical ambience of the place or the fact that the Pastor is handsome or because the choir can sing well – as important as these things are. It should primarily be based on the soundness of the word that proceeds from the altar.

What the two of you are hearing every Sunday matters a lot to the survival of your marriage. And if I’ll be blunt, a church that will help your marriage is that Church that focuses on teaching the life of Jesus from all angles and insisting that all members must conform to Him. Other focuses like material prosperity, healing, freedom from principalities and powers etc; if that’s all you hear every Sunday, may help your life in other ways but certainly have no direct contribution in helping you live at peace with each other and maintaining the wine of your marriage.

You must insist that she must follow you to Church every Sunday and for Bible Study during the week. Seize also every opportunity for camp meetings, couples retreat and other edifying programs from trusted platforms. Drag her there by all means possible. There are truths that she will never be able to receive from your mouth even if you’re a preacher. But if the same truth comes to her through another preacher under a corporate spiritual atmosphere, you’ll see her come under genuine conviction.

Apart from the regular church programs, there’s a bible study I do with my wife every week for at least two hours. Sometimes we are there for four hours. Is it always convenient for her? The answer is no. When it’s time for the bible study, sometimes she’s resting, I’ll wake her up; except she’s sick or there are other good reasons why I should allow her to rest. In such a case we can reschedule.

But if there’s no such good reason, I’ll wake her up. If after the first attempt, she refuses to stand up, I’ll go back to wake her up the second time. If she snaps at me, I won’t care. If she frowns her face, I won’t look at her face. I will stay on her neck until she stands up and takes her sit with me at the table of Bible study.

Why am I this insistent? It’s because her spirit must be fed. I have a divine responsibility to nourish her spirit. Besides that, the health of our marriage depends on it. Whenever a couple is far from the word, they’ll notice they are both more intolerant and touchy towards each other. If you want your wife to remain tenderhearted, submissive, amenable, sweet to relate with, you must keep her close to the word.

By the time she finally sits beside me on the table of study, she may still be frowning. As the Bible study proceeds, I would then begin to induce her to smile.? I will touch her where she’ll not like so that she can loosen up. I won’t tell you where. ? This is because she needs to loosen up to really be blessed by the Bible Study. At the end of that Bible study we’re best of friends, both so blessed and praying for long in response to the word.

Why have I told you these details? Nourishing your wife’s spirit progressively often involves a forceful yet loving drag. The reason is that Bible study of two hours or a camp meeting of four days (Word and Prayers Only) is not as funning as drinking ice cream wit pop corn in front of a large television screen.

May you not fail in keeping this Likewise. The Likewise of nourishing her body, soul and Spirit.

Your brother,
Peniela E. Akintujoye.

©️Peniela Eniayo, Akintujoye| hello@lovestraighttalks.com

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