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Anyone who desires to be a husband – the head and progenitor of a home – desires to be a servant. Going by the philosophy of the author and finisher of this our faith, any aspiration to leadership is an aspiration unto service rather than status.

No wonder the Bible says, “whosoever desires the office of a Bishop desires a good WORK.” To us, being a Bishop is a big status to be coveted; it’s a prestigious title, a place to feed fat. But God doesn’t look at it as status or position or title but WORK! If your mindset is about work, then you’re welcome.

The mindset of the world is that leadership position is status, a place to be served; a place to eat the biggest meat, a place to be giving orders to others and practically doing nothing. And so in the world system, the easiest way to recognise the highest officer in a place or establishment is to check for who everyone is serving but who is serving no one.

Our Lord Jesus Christ had an opportunity during His earthly ministry to correct this wrong mindset.

The mother of James and John the sons of Zebedee had approached Jesus for an unusual request. She wanted her two sons to be the ones to sit, one on the left and the other on the right hand of Jesus in His Kingdom. When the other disciples heard about it, they were filled with indignation, showing clearly that they were also interested in being one of the greatest in the Kingdom.

When Jesus was to correct this worldly mindset, he had the following to say, and I want you to pay close attention to what He said.

But Jesus called them to Himself and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles Lord it over them, and those who are great exercise authority over them. Yet it shall not be so among you; but whoever desires to become great among you, let him be your servant. And whoever desires to be first among you, let him be your slave— just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”
Matthew 20:25‭-‬28 NKJV

The rulers of the gentiles, rulers in the world system, they Lord it over their subjects. They rule them tyrannically and with pride. When the Governor is approaching the podium, his security details will sometimes push down so irreverently cheering citizens who want to catch a glimpse of their Governor – whom they gave the power to be in office. In the world system, there’s nothing abnormal about that.

Just because the President will pass through a route by 6pm, sometimes as early as 8am, the route has been locked down and citizens that he’s supposed to be serving will be sweating like goats inside harrowing traffic lock-jam for hours. That’s the world system for you. Leadership is about status, oppressing people, putting other people down, living on people, grabbing the fattest bone, rather than service to the people.

IT SHALL NOT BE SO AMONG YOU.

This was Jesus’ emphatic instruction to the disicples. It shall not be so among you! Among you who are my followers, whosoever must be the greatest must be the servant of all. The mindset of the kingdom is the opposite of that of the world. In the world, the greatest is the person that everyone is serving. In the Kingdom of God, the greatest is the person that is serving everyone else!

If the man is therefore considered as the highest ranking officer of his family; if he’s considered the greatest; the way to prove that in Jesus’ perspective is by being the servant of all – by serving his wife and his children; bending down to wash their feet, serving their food; sometimes clearing their plates. That’s how to be the greatest as a Kingdom husband.

Sometimes as a husband, you need to prove that you’re the greatest by making this announcement, “this weekend, I’m washing everyone’s clothes and polishing everyone’s shoes in this house, beginning with that of my wife.” And if one of your children says, “No, Daddy, you can’t wash my clothes. That would be too disrespectful,” you’ll answer him the same way Jesus answered Peter, “If I do not wash you, (your clothes), you have no part with me.”

Then your Child will say, “Daddy, not my clothes only, my bag and shoes also.”

FOR EVEN THE SON OF MAN DID NOT COME TO BE SERVED, BUT TO SERVE.

Waoh! What a statement! Even the son of man; the Lord of all; the Saviour of the world; the creator of all things; the heir of all things; came not to be served but to serve. He made Himself of no reputation and served like a servant. He bent down in all His glory to wash the dirty feet of his own disciples, ordinary men who are the work of His hands. O to be like thee blessed redeemer!

If Jesus could serve in this manner, who am I? If I am to be to my wife what He was to the church, then I must serve my wife like a servant. Whenever the need arises, I must wash her clothes, clean her shoes, clear her plates, carry the big load while she walks freely, run errands for her, and do other menial jobs with so much joy and pride.

As from now on, may your mindset change completely. May you see as from today the position of husband as service rather than status. And may you immediately step into this service. After all, you’re the greatest. Or aren’t you?

Whosoever desires the office of a husband desires a good WORK!

Your brother,
Peniela E. Akintujoye.

©️Peniela Eniayo, Akintujoye| hello@lovestraighttalks.com

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#raisingchristlikecouples
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